A Determination, Thank You And Goodbye.

So, tonight, i've made a resolution. A heart determination. Yes, i have to kill those feelings. The feeling of friendship and respect. Yes, this is about the one whom i wrote about lately in this cosmosphere.

In my previous post, i wrote about trying to think positively and other. Yes i have tried it. But too bad, it doesn't work. It was a total waste of time to think like that. I have tried to contact him, tried to make up for my silly mistake and tried to get along as a friend. But i don't have any replies from him. All that determination to make up, just go into the dustbin. He didn't reply at all. Not in facebook nor in plurk. I'm totally tired being in this kind of state where i'm trapped in agony and anguish. If i can't make up with him, then the only solution is back to the point where we don't know each other. It's better this way for me. I won't ever tried to make up again.

So, tonight, i'm going to erase all the link i have with him. So, i text him to return all my dvds. At first he doesn't even reply it. But after some unreplied chat in facebook and unreplied comment in plurk, he answered it at plurk. I know it from his replies that he had some things on his mind which trying to distance himself from me. And yes, after some wait, he came to my kost and returned my dvds. With this, everything should be ended and yes, actually i'm a little bit sad because at first, i think we could be bestfriend since i know we had some things in common and i really enjoyed talking with him because i had a similiar prespective with him. It's hard to find someone like yourself you know? But what could i do?

So, this is the last post i'm going to talk about him. I'll kill his existance in my brain. Just like those days of laughter never been there and yep, i won't ever tried to make up anymore. So god, i usually be strong at anykind of situation. But please, at this time, please let me be weak and make me stronger tomorrow. It's really hurt when you lost your friend and especially the one whom you think can be your bestfriend.

And here, it's my determination, i won't tried to be a friend anymore with him. It's his turn if he really still think of me as his friend. Oh but don't be mistaken. It's not like i will see him as a pile of poo, and never ever want to interact with him anymore, no. It's just like a classic game of "Ular Tangga", i'm going back to square one. I'm tired of trying being friend with him. Thank You and Goodbye. Thanks for those days of laughter.